xmlns:og='http://ogp.me/ns#' Yeah. Good Times.: The Birthday Free Pass

Wednesday, January 26, 2011

The Birthday Free Pass

I think that on the day of your birthday you should get to do whatever you want. On MY birthday, I get drunk and run around the streets naked. The one day out of the year when you have a free pass? It's only fair, right? This is the theory I subscribe to in my house, anyway.

Lately my kids have been arguing about everything. Perfectly natural for siblings to do, and usually I stay out of it and let them fight amongst themselves (unless something is about to get broken or somebody is about to get hurt or I'm about to hurt somebody and then I intervene). I have a whole long explanation about why I do this, but that will take me off topic (moreso), so let's just go with "I'm really fucking lazy and don't have the energy to deal with it most of the time." That's believable enough, I figure. But today was Child 1's birthday and I was able to say all day long "Sorry, Child 2, but it's Child 1's birthday and he gets to decide today. When it's your birthday you get to do the same." It really made things easier, because how can you argue with that when you're 5? Child 2 says "Wow, Child 1 sure is bossy today." I said "It's his birthday, it's okay."

Anyway, today I let him have his way with me, and since he's so used to being bossed around by me, he had a BLAST telling me what to do, mostly while I was driving. Here are some examples of the things he said and got away with:

"Drive as close as you can to that car in front of us!"

"STOP for the red light!!" (thanks for that one, dude)

"Turn left. Then left again. Now turn around and go back the other way. Now turn right."

"Don't drive down this street, turn around and go down the one we just passed."

"Can I have a bologna sandwich while I wait for you to make dinner?"

"MAMA! Come into my room and turn the light on for me! Okay, you can go now." (hmmmm. starting to bug me just a little bit, but okay....)

"Come in the mancave while I watch videos. You have to lie down and not speak until I say you can." (this was nearly impossible but I managed it somehow)


It was fun.


Raquel's World said...

That's a grand idea. Not sure if I could pull it off though.

Claire said...

Is it just me, or is there something suspicious about that last one....

Ashley said...

That's awesome. I wonder if I could get away with that for my next birthday.

Dani G said...

Get drunk and run through the streets naked? You do that on your birthday? I do that on Tuesdays.

Caryn said...

I LOVE this post! Not sure I could handle that, with the other six monsters making my life a living hell, but I LOVE the whole concept! Good going, Momma!

autismand said...

That shouting instructions to you whilst you're driving thing? I do that to my hubby ALL THE TIME.

MommyToTwoBoys said...

It actually is my birthday today. I gotta go. Need to start drinking, strip, and get out in those streets!

Rebecca said...

That sounds amazing. Lots of fun!

Mad Housewife said...

I wish I could get away with this in my house on my birthday. LOL Happy birthday Child 1!

Cheryl D. said...


Megan said...

Hi, new follower here from Dysfunctional Supermom! I'm all about having a free pass on your birthday but frankly any day of the year works if you want to get drunk and run around naked. I say go for it! I'm loving your sense of humor and absolute honesty! Wish there were more of us. Thats why I love Dysfunctional Supermom!

I did a guest post over at Tatted Mom and I am one to lay it all on the line. I'd love for you to check me out and my post at http://1funkywoman.blogspot.com


Anonymous said...

I love you. That is all.

Oh, and even though we're probably the same age, i really wish you could adopt me! :)

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