Slowing down

Sometimes I get stuck "underneath a boy," as I call it, which means that one of them comes along and sits on me. It's a very different experience depending on which on it is; Child 2 will generally bounce and jump and ask a zillion questions about whatever and in the end he'll give me an order of some sort. But sometimes Child 1 will sit on me, and I'm forced to slow myself down. I'll never ask him to get up because I love that he volunteers to share space with me (don't love that at 3 in the morning, but love it when I'm awake). Usually it means I lose the use of my hands so there's nothing to do but just stop whatever I'm doing and sit and wait.

It's weird, being forced to slow down like that at random intervals throughout the day. I have nothing but my thoughts and the sound of the child whispering in my ear about BART trains. There's no computer, no blackberry, no rushing around trying to get stuff done, I just sit there with my beautiful child on top of me. It's probably not something I would ever do if he wasn't sitting on me, and just now I was thinking about how unusual it was for me to just sit and do nothing.

Try it sometimes, just sitting and doing nothing. Turn off the TV if you keep it on, no music, no computer, don't talk, just think.

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