xmlns:og='http://ogp.me/ns#' Yeah. Good Times.: "All Kids Do That" Part 18: Obsessions

Thursday, April 19, 2012

"All Kids Do That" Part 18: Obsessions

See the tab above for more information about this series.

Today's contribution is from the mysterious, nameless blogger from My Whac-A-Mole Life. Who is she? What is her name?? NOBODY KNOWS!


“I must confess I don’t know why my brother is obsessed by trucks,” harmonically laments Justin Roberts in his popular, cutesy kid’s song of the same name.

True, most parents with young kids will at some point roll their eyes and complain that little Johnny is “obsessed” with (CIRCLE ONE):  trucks; trains; superheroes; princesses; Dora; a particular blankie. Or maybe it’s a bedraggled stuffed animal, like the one featured in that adorable, mainstream picture book series – “Knuffle Bunny.” Aw, kids are so cute.

Unfortunately, these obsessions, as depicted by Justin Roberts and Mo Willems, respectively, are merely child’s play!

Both of my children have been professionally labeled with, among many other diagnoses, OCD.  Autism - which is prominent on my daughter’s CV - is known to include perseverative behaviors. And she, like many others on the spectrum, cleverly applies this perseveration to her passion du jour.

Oh that it would be something as cute and relatable as princesses! Instead, here’s a sampling of my 7-year-old’s die-hard obsessions over the past couple of years:
  • Red shirts
  • Hotels – logos, furniture, lobbies
  • Doctor’s offices (particularly shots)
  • Beds. Sometimes chairs. Rugs too.
  • Hamburgers
  • Pumpkins
  • Bags – first Ziplocs and then paper bags, particularly the one pictured here:
  • Bathrooms
  • Cake mixes

So yeah, for starters, the actual objects of desire are weird. Now let’s look at how this plays out, using her current obsession (four months and going strong): Expo dry erase markers. She doesn’t necessarily like to draw with them, mind you. She prefers hoarding, admiring and “talking” about them.

  • Every store we go into that could possibly sell markers, she’s off and running to the office supply section. Full tantrum ensues unless we buy her dry erase markers. And no, the cheap, generic brands will not do. Must. Be. Expo.
  • Given some freedom on her iPad (she uses it as a speaking device and I’m thrilled that her spelling, reading and typing skills are developing), she is on YouTube or Safari seeking a dry erase marker fix. Sampling of search terms she has employed: Expo, markers, dry erase, purple (yes, just purple), and so on. We have watched boring, corporate whiteboard presentations; we have visited every online office supply store in existence; and we have endured countless Expo ads. Too bad she can’t be a spokesperson.
  • Our home copy machine has run out of toner because she likes to make copies of Expo logos, boxes and markers. Unfortunately, she must have the markers arranged just so on the machine. Since they are cylindrical and they roll, she has yet to achieve the perfection she seeks. (See picture). Thus, we run out of paper or patience first and then the machine must “go to sleep.” This basically ruins her day.
  • Speaking of sleep, a particular picture (it varies per day) and perhaps even a marker go to bed with her.  How do we know which one she wants? We don’t; only she does. Lord help us all if she can’t find it!
  • When we pick her brother up from school, she repeats over and over that she has to go to the bathroom. When I am stupid enough to give in, I realize it’s her sneaky way of gaining access to the secretary’s office and pilfering the jar of Expo markers on her desk. Cue full meltdown when I do not let her take them. How do I explain?
  • Anywhere we go…any house we visit…she is on the hunt for Expo markers. It’s uncanny and kind of impressive that she has the ability to locate them everywhere. Her sixth sense leads her right to them. “Oh, does she want to color? Is she looking for a toy?” someone might ask. Um, no, I must reply, she just wants your Expo marker.

I could go on, but you get the picture. In a way, I’m grateful for the marker obsession. Previously, you might have witnessed me in the middle of Target screaming at my beautiful, tear-stricken, bawling daughter:  “No, I am not taking you to the doctor! You may not get a shot today!” Emotionally numb after repeating this statement so frequently, I had little awareness as to how disturbing it sounded to anyone else.

I can only speculate that these passions fulfill some sort of sensory need for her.  I imagine that they provide some semblance of comfort, or a feeling of control over her environment. Since she is largely nonverbal, I cannot know for sure. However, I do know this: All kids DO NOT do that.



Comments (35)

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that's an impressive list of obsessive items that definitely aren't in the typical realm. my daughter is currently on her least annoying obsession and it's littlest pet shop toys which are very cute and don't stand out in public. for this, i'm thankful.
i hope your daughter finds the markers she so desires and that the next item she finds to crave will be even easier to deal with and certainly not in the realm of shots.
My recent post it smells faintly of raspberries
1 reply · active 675 weeks ago
Thank you! Shots were definitely one of the worst. I still fear how that might play out in teenage years...!
My recent post All Kids Do That
I'd be thrilled with Expo markers right now. Our 8 year old, super sweet/affectionate/would never hurt anyone, is currently obsessing over guns. He watched his dad play Call of Duty one night and has not stopped talking about guns since. "Mama, what shoots faster, a machine gun, a pistol, or a shot gun?" "Mama, can someone get killed with a gun by hitting them with it?" "Mama, how much do you think a pistol weighs?" [various gun shooting sounds, hands shaped like guns, more gun shooting sounds] "Mama, look at this gun I built out of Lego's!!!!!!"

"[Son], PLEASE stop talking about guns."

2 minutes later...

"Mama, can someone die from being shot once with a pistol?"

Note to self: no more 8 year old watching Call of Duty. I promise my kid is not a serial killer in-the-making.
My recent post This is What Autism Looks Like
1 reply · active 675 weeks ago
Wow, Kiesha. I hope this one passes sooner rather than later. Perhaps, as Becky commented below regarding outlets, it's more of a fear thing. I think I've self-promoted enough on Jill's site here, but if you have a minute, take a look at this post I wrote a few months ago about another angle of anxiety/ocd. It's about the other kid, who is often paralyzed with worry. Maybe it will give you some ideas.
http://www.whac-a-mole-life.com/2011/11/i-think-i...

My recent post How Old Is She?
I'm too tired to write a long comment, but I feel I should let you know that these posts are probably my most favorite/much needed reads in the history of the internet. :)
My recent post Outfit :: Parallel
1 reply · active 675 weeks ago
I second that, Jodi. Not my entry here, per se, but the whole series. Yay Jill!
My recent post How Old Is She?
My kid had an obsession with electrical outlets for a long time. Everywhere we went, restaurants, the bathroom, the doctors office, Wal-Mart, wherever, we had to go on an elctrical outlet hunt or the meltdown would ensue. I think she was actually afraid of them, and by knowing where they all were, I think she felt they couldn't sneak up on her. After that, it progressed for a short while to lightbulbs. God help anyone, if one was blown out. It had to be fixed, RIGHT.NOW. Now, her obsession seems to be with ensuring that all her stuffed animals are lined up and placed JUST SO on her bed. I totally get you, Whack a Mole. Totally get you.
My recent post They Tell me I Concentrate too Much on the Autism...
2 replies · active 675 weeks ago
Twinsies! Racing over to your blog, right now!
My recent post How Old Is She?
mine does that required precision with the arranging of stuffed animals too! God forbid someone moves one or one gets moved to unapproved location. insanity will ensue. stuffed animals sound harmless, but it's no less intensely frustrating when they're wrong.
My recent post it smells faintly of raspberries
So excited to be here!

Yes, I must remain anonymous as I am in witness protection. Here's why: http://www.whac-a-mole-life.com/2012/03/my-secret...

I love seeing these comments and will reply a little later. Meanwhile, does anyone know how to say "rugs" in Italian? We're looking at the IKEA catalog my daughter has downloaded, and I'm stumped.
My recent post All Kids Do That
Hah, that is an impressive dedication to expo markers. Stealing from the secretary - pretty clever.
My recent post Pigletta Again.
I feel your pain. My son's obsession is wallets. He has had a collection of about 25 or so. But all gone through a very rough process where he presently has one. But worse part is when he stares at men in stores or malls, staring at their butts! He's even been called on it twice by scruffy looking strangers, even a homeless guy once for looking at him with an intense interest. This has gone on for four years now, and stronger than ever. Best of luck to all with obsessions.
My recent post Those Awful Scars
1 reply · active 675 weeks ago
Oh my. My daughter also is a hair-sniffer, which can be awkward...especially when she became fascinated with the chest/belly hair of a man standing in front of her in line for a water slide. I saw it coming...but only 1 second too late. My heart goes out to you too!
My recent post How Old Is She?
You need to tweet expo and get them to give you a factory tour or something. @expomarkers, or http://www.facebook.com/expomarkers, but you probably already know all that stuff.

Also, maybe they'll give you drawing lessons!
My recent post Just a Lil Walk
1 reply · active 675 weeks ago
Done. Sent the Tweet...nothing back yet. They probably don't know what to make of all this!

Oh, and as for the comment on the drawing lessons...*ignored*.
My recent post All Kids Do That
Your daughter can hang out with me ANY TIME! I love dry erase markers and office supplies in general -- and with that bag obsession, she'd fit in perfectly with my own Little Miss -- just send her on over!
My recent post Nearly Wordless Wednesday
1 reply · active 675 weeks ago
Perfect! She's on her way!
My recent post All Kids Do That
Spatulas. She was obsessed with spatulas for several months. Any store we went in, she found them, and stuck them in her mouth. Then I had to buy them. Sigh.
My recent post And a new chapter begins
1 reply · active 675 weeks ago
Of course, spatulas. Why not spatulas? Maybe one day they'll explain it to us!
My recent post All Kids Do That
Wow, chills. There's got to be something to this Expo obsession. Everyone's coming out of the closet with it after this post! The drawings sound great. Mine prefers writing words...or just collecting the markers. Just found you on Twitter. Thanks for the retweet too!
My recent post All Kids Do That
I love this post because I too am so sick of parents saying, "Oh, all my kids were obsessed with Thomas, too." I am lucky, though, as my son with autism has been obsessed with relatively typical items, like LEGO and Angry Birds. My toddler is obsessed with Thomas and Kipper and I am trying to figure out whether this indicates he might have Asperger's or whether it's the typical version of obsession. Not too sure.

My recent post Anatomy of a field trip
1 reply · active 675 weeks ago
Oh come on, Patty. You know all kids do that! ;)
My recent post All Kids Do That
NOT the bent or wrinkled corners!!!! Nooooo! She goes nuts when the toilet paper is not turn in a straight line. We have lots of discarded paper squares all over the bathroom floor as she tries to achieve the perfection she seeks. My heart breaks for these kids! And I'm heading over to your blog right now to read all about "idiosyncrasies"- such a nice euphemism.
My recent post All Kids Do That
My kids minor obsessions make me crazy. I'm exhausted from reading this post! Also I am thinking of gathering up all my expo markers and sending them to you. =D
My recent post Rest in Peace, Lilly
1 reply · active 675 weeks ago
How sweet...but please, for the love of God, don't! Let's not feed the monster!
:$
My recent post How Old Is She?
Bags! Ziploc bags! I thought we were the only ones! My little Maxie has become overwhelmingly in love with these things and insists on putting tiny single objects in them. Think one goldfish cracker, a lego piece, a half-chewed vitamin, an old chapstick, a toy car. The obsession has since progressed to putting BAGS in BAGS! Thanks for the great post!
My recent post Last autumn: A piece from my memoir.
1 reply · active 675 weeks ago
Seriously and for real? You know that picture I posted with all the Expo copies/markers? Well, I could do the same with the Ziploc bag logo. During the height of that obsession, her favorite place on earth was Costco.

It's uncanny that some of these obsessions are shared with others. Thanks, Alicia! Popping over to your blog now, too!
My recent post Tales from the Minivan
one time I tried to take Fred to Wilma's physical therapy appointment. He had a full on meltdown in the waiting room (sooo bad that I NEVER brought him back) because I had 7 crayons in my diaper bag. Not the full 8. I was missing the black one. He HADDDD to have all the crayons lined up in exact order. A Year later with lots of occupational therapy and abilify (a wonderful med), he perseverates a bit less. Having said that, he's taken to licking me lately. But he doesn't lick at school, so it's all good. PS--- I like expo markers too!
My recent post Teaching Independence
1 reply · active 674 weeks ago
Meds do help, but OCD is kind of a hydra. Maybe you work very hard and manage to diminish one particular obsession. Before you know it, two new ones seem to pop up. It's going to be a lifelong battle, I imagine.

Totally understand the crayon issue and I'm glad it waned. We tried Abilify, but she has been tough to treat. She tends to be one of those kids who responds to meds with the opposite behavior than what's on the label. We landed on a cocktail of a few different meds, but we're still tweaking.

As for licking - yep, been there. I swear, any little thing can turn into a new obsession. ONE change in routine becomes the expected. The tricky part is that I never know which one that will be. If we go to Ikea one afternoon,suddenly she is obsessed with Ikea. (Okay, bad example..who isn't?) But I just never know when it's going to hit. We just keep at it and take it day by day.
My recent post How Old Is She?
ah. i had problems finding this post, the link in the list does not work.
my son developed a (lasting) obsession with all things supermario and I avoid tell people because of course "all kids do that".
useless to say that the extend he dwells on, studies, wants to play and imposes perception of the game's environment to everyone around him, eventually makes people understand it's not just a game for him. ..
nikki, future mother of a plumber with 'stache.
(oh, it's a crisis safe job, right ?)
My recent post Nasty little boy.
I love the reference to watching that whiteboard presentation. "One" of my grandson's (he's 10) recent obsessions was The Great Auk. I have no idea how he found out about it, but at one point I was sitting next to him watching a 27-minute CG documentary on it from the Nat. Geo website. When the Scandinavian explorers clubbed the auks to extinction before us onscreen, he looked at me with what seemed to be horror and hopelessness. We had a long talk about conservation and how that would never happen (in a perfect world) again, but it's hard for him to understand the context of "history" and that it may not repeat itself.
age 2, books -- oh how i miss it being books.
age 3, fire alarms, smoke detectors. well this is getting... awkward.
age 4, plumbing. toilet diagrams. the sewer system.

age 5: PLEASE GOD LET'S MOVE ON DEAR GOD I DON'T WANT TO TALK ABOUT PLUMBING ANYMORE.

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