xmlns:og='http://ogp.me/ns#' Yeah. Good Times.: The thin line beyond which you really can't fake

Saturday, December 3, 2011

The thin line beyond which you really can't fake

EDIT: Link to purchase Grateful Dead snuggie

Drunk blogging is fun. Also? I AM VERY EMPHATIC SOMETIMES AND I USE ALL CAPS TO EXPRESS THAT.

Okay, so, I was thinking... you know what I haven't done in a while? Gotten drunk and just started typing. Why haven't I done that? Probably because... okay, I don't know. But surely there's a reason. Anyway, here we are. I'll be typing this post in stages this evening. At this point it's relatively early and I'm being very conscious about my spelling and grammar and making sure there are no extra punctuation marks in the middle of my words. But, I dig;ress....

There are a number of very interesting things I would like to share with you fine people on this fine evening. Is it really "fine," though? What does "fine" mean, anyway? What does it mean to be "fine," exactly? Also? Uh, oh what I want to know..... oh oh, is are you.... well, you know the rest. Or you don't. If you do, though, you're cool. If not... just move on.

Speaking of which, today I was wearing my Jerry Day t-shirt, and I was walking into a store on Solano Ave in Berkeley to buy a present for my Secret Santa giftee (by the way, Secret Santa? I see you here. Did you know I made this for you? That's the problem with being downvoted into oblivion, if you make a post specifically for one person they will probably never see it. So look at that post. LOOK AT IT!) and this random dude stopped me and said "hey, is that Jerry? I'm really into trivia and I was the only person at the bar the other night who got this question right: What was the original name of the Grateful Dead?" I answered it right and he was pleased and walked away. Do you know the answer? Tell me the answer and win a prize. No, really.

OH, and speaking of THAT.... OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD. Okay, almost exactly a year ago, I posted this. THIS. CLICK ON THE FUCKING THING. And now? Almost a year later?  LOOK WHAT I GOT TODAY. LOOK. LOOOOOK AAAAAT IIIIIITTTT:



That's me, bitches. THAT'S FUCKING ME. Wearing a motherfucking Grateful Dead snuggie!!!! By the way, that's the closest you'll ever get to seeing what I look like. ENJOY THE BOOB, MOTHERFUCKERS.

Anyhoozle-ini, do you guys ever think about friends you used to have but don't anymore? I have this person who used to be my friend, a really good friend, actually, and we're not friends anymore, for various complicated reasons, and the other night she popped up in my dream and said to me "hey let's be friends again!" and in my dream I was really happy about that and then I woke up and knew that this would never happen, because of those complicated reasons I mentioned earlier, even though I still see her practically every day at this point I have no idea how to even make it happen again and she hates me, anyway, so even so we'll never be friends again besides there's too much baggage going on there, but still, it was nice to be friends with her again in my dream. Does that ever happen to you? No? Huh. Okay! Let's move on....



Hey you know what's a cool word? Spigot. Doesn't it kind of seem like a racial slur? You fucking spigot! I hate that fucking spigot! Yeah, but it's not. It's just a cool word. And when hubs comes here and reads this, maybe he'll explain it to you. Then again maybe he won't. When he leaves a comment, though, his name will be thesmos. LOOK FOR HIM.

And now I will end this awesome post with the following song that I think you should listen to because this song fucking kicks more ass than most songs that have ever been made into songs.

Jackie Greene, Gone Wanderin'





Okay, so!

Any questions?



Comments (37)

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Nice outfit - I ALMOST trumps my feeted pajamas with the trapdoor butt. That is sex on a stick.
My recent post How NOT to Smuggle Cuban Cigars into the United States
1 reply · active 695 weeks ago
I have a friend like that, only I'm the one who ended the friendship earlier this year. Only, she didn't notice for probably six months. And only just texted me last night with "we used to talk all the time, why don't we anymore?" I'm not sure I'm going to explain.
My recent post Free Kibble!
"Spigot" is an awesome word. We need more words like spigot in the English language. Fo sure!
Get the fuck outta my head woman!

nice slippers.

spigot. *snort* you know what other word is awesome--at least in my limited world? Shenanigans. I may have convinced my boss to use that in the title of one of his music volumes. and by convince i mean make him roll his eyes and question hiring me.

cheers!

My recent post Turns Out I Was A Hipster And Didn’t Even Know It.
3 replies · active 695 weeks ago
Okay, seriously, which part of this drunken mess was in your head, too?
i think about lost friends alot--too much--and have conversations/arguments/prison brawls with them in my head ALL THE TIME.

And i think about cool words alot too. I used to do it more, but then i had a kid and that whole "be sober during the day" thing started. buzzkills.

I do not, however own a snuggle. Or a big blue barrel in my house. ;)

My recent post Turns Out I Was A Hipster And Didn’t Even Know It.
DO NOT SPEAK OF THE BARREL
Wow! Somebody cut loose on Friday night, although I totally see you had reason to celebrate! I got dumped plenty of times in my younger days, but the day a female friend told me she'd like to end our friendship...using those actual words...wtf? Just stop calling, I didn't need formal notice!
My recent post December!
Wow. You are so 100% right about "spigot" sounding like a slur, and I never ever thought about it until now. Excuse me, I need to test this by calling my boyfriend a dirty spigot and seeing how he reacts. I think you're on to something.
My recent post Printers and Allie. In that order.
2 replies · active 694 weeks ago
Let me know how it goes!!
He agrees. He said it sounds like a bigot and a sp** mixed together.
My recent post Printers and Allie. In that order.
That snuggie is AWESOME!!! and that video was filmed at Austin City Limits Music Festival. Cool.
My recent post Cartoons and Behavior Analysis
Ohhh I think all of us have an ex friend like that. It would be nice if we could all get together at Christmas and do an old best friend swap, sort of like a white elephant thing, you know?
1 reply · active 695 weeks ago
White elephant thing? Like ivory?
Who needs friends when you have a Grateful Dead Snuggie?
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1 reply · active 695 weeks ago
Damn straight!!

:'(
Handflapper's avatar

Handflapper · 695 weeks ago

DAMMIT, WHY WASN'T I DRUNK WITH YOU LAST NIGHT??? DOOVER. I DEMAND A DO OVER. I made the two words the second time because while I was pretty sure it was one word, after I saw it there in the box, I realized it just looked like I'd made a typo while trying to write about a vacuum cleaner. Dooover? Do-over? Do over?

And I'm not even drunk.
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1 reply · active 695 weeks ago
I smoked a huge doover last night and got soooooo wasted
That's your comment score in Intense Debate, you need to make a profile there and use it to comment here to get it :)
drunk blogging your awesome
:)
My recent post What happened to the....
I think I've seen like 3 pics of you in the past 10 years and all of them were in a Snuggie.... wait, I forgot about that one from Vegas...but what happens in Vegas..etc..etc.__I know what that blue barrell is, and I know it has a bung hole. I also own the special tool you need to remove the bung hole plug.
3 replies · active 694 weeks ago
That's because that's all I ever wear. I go to work wearing a snuggie, I drop off the kids wearing a snuggie, etc. I'm pretty sure I was wearing a snuggie in Vegas, even though it was 7 years ago and I don't think they had been invented yet.

hee hee, though. You said bung hole.
Then your stick figure drawings should be a giant blue blob with an adorable curley haired face on it.
Crap. You're right.
I'll uvula you good!

ew
I'll have whatever she's having!
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1 reply · active 694 weeks ago
Vodka. I was having vodka.
Beyond terrific. :)
My recent post Strange Days
Have you ever heard of the shampoo-effect (invented by my friend Joey so probably not) Anyway, you know how if you leave a little bit of shampoo in your hair then the you add some water to it it gets all soapy again? Well that's what happens with alcohol too... you drink a lot Friday night, still in your system for drinks with lunch on Saturday and wa-la drunk again with just a little "water"

ANYWAY - your post just did that to me. I feel drunk from last night again.

That was a long story to get to the funny part. Maybe not so funny.
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I was looking for a thesmos comment :(

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I totally thought that was a GD kimono. Ha.

And is that blue thing a RAIN BARREL?

Wow, you just get more and more.....interesting.
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