xmlns:og='http://ogp.me/ns#' Yeah. Good Times.: Great moments in parenting

Sunday, August 8, 2010

Great moments in parenting

The scene: We're in the kitchen. The kids are both asking endless questions: "Is breakfast ready yet?" "what can I eat while I wait for breakfast?" "How many more minutes until breakfast is ready?" "Why isn't there food in my mouth right now?" etc. I'm trying to be patient and explain that just because 30 seconds ago I spoke aloud the words "I'm going to go make breakfast," it doesn't mean that it's time to eat already. (I mean, come ON, guys, at least let me make coffee!) They're milling around and I'm emptying the dishwasher and I turn around, with a frying pan in my hand, and Child 2 has suddenly materialized out of nowhere directly in front and underneath me like some kind of freakin poltergeist and I SMACK him right on top of his head with the frying pan. It made this perfect THWOK sound. And then I YELL, which definitely made things worse, "OH MY GOD!" Breakfast preparation was subsequently delayed by another 10 minutes.

What's that expression? Oh, right. Yeah. Good times.....

UPDATE: I just asked the boy "how's your head where I hit you with a frying pan?" and he looks at me... SHOCKED... and says "I thought it was a plate!?"

Um. Is it too late to say "plate?"



13 comments:

Right wing bastard said...

My little princess wakes up early with daddy and we make coffee together. She likes hers with half cream, coco, sugar and whipped cream on top. Then we make eggs and toast and whisper in the kitchen before the others wake up.
So.... basically,I have it so much better than you I wanted to share. ;)

jillsmo said...

So, you're saying you've never hit one of your kids over the head with a frying pan before? Yeah, okay, whatever. *eyeroll*

Right wing bastard said...

LOL, when my son was little, my wife had a thing for that iron cook wear. He was underfoot so much, I am sure we've done some serious damage. But hey, it's not like they can take your parenting license away.

Desfaber said...

Oh, please; if I had a nickel for every time my mother hit me on the head with something heavy, I'd be a... well, I'd have, five multiplied by... um.. you know what I'm not really good at math any more.

Right wing bastard said...

Once i found my boy toddler standing on a stool with a bottle of cough syrup in his hand and a face covered in it. I freaked and called the poison hotline. That was a mistake. After that, I was basically treated by the PCC as a potential child poisoner and all around incompetent parent.
They called and sent me reminder flyers about how stupid people can injure their kids all the time. We had to move away.

jillsmo said...

Ok, so, lesson learned! Never call poison control in a poison-related emergency. Gotcha!

Michelle "whatsmylastnameagain" Utech said...

Omg- thanks for the laughter.... With a 4 month old going through sleep regression, I needed it! *sigh* *yawn*

Right wing bastard said...

That's right, call a doctor. Or your mom, chances are anything your kid swallows, you swallowed when you were that age.... and she can tell you what she did wrong.

Lynn said...

Visiting this ancient post from Blog Gems. I've got DCFS on the line right now...but it looks like I'm 3 months late. Any residual concussion symptoms?

jillsmo said...

Uh...... no?

Emma said...

Oops, that really made me laugh though!

Visiting you from Blog gems x

Livi said...

ROFL! That is hilarious!

@jencull (jen) said...

lol. How do they manage to just appear like that though? I have often clobbered my eldest with my elbow in the face as I turn around and he is just THERE! He is perfect elbow height and you would think I did it on purpose. Has he been reminding you of the pan incident since? Jen

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