xmlns:og='http://ogp.me/ns#' Yeah. Good Times.: The Dive Bar Welcomes: Becky

Sunday, September 18, 2011

The Dive Bar Welcomes: Becky

Today we welcome Becky who blogs at A Side of Rice. Hello Becky!!!


Two Words: You're Alive

On the morning of September 11, 2001, my sister sat on the runway at O'Hare airport, her flight waiting for clearance to take off.  She's a flight attendant for United.  As the horrific events of the morning unfolded, our family (mom, dad, myself and two other sisters - and countless other family members) were desperately trying to reach her. We didn't know her schedule and didn't know if she was on any of the ill-fated flights that day.

On September 11, 2011 my sister posted the following on facebook:

   I have had a number of strangers ask me how I am doing today, but not one of my loved ones has called to check on me.  Hmmm.

Her post ignited a bunch of commentary, to the tune of:

   What is wrong with your family?
   How thoughtless of them!
   We love you even if they don't

And when I saw this assault, I commented:

   By "loved ones" do you mean your family?  If so, then you'll have to consider me offended. On that day 10 years ago we did not know if you were working one of the flights and were desperate to find out.  When we did finally realize you were ok, we were relieved.  And then the guilt kicked in. Because our relief was so many others' unimaginable grief.  Not to be a snot about it, but this really is an unfair characterization of your family - not to mention uninformed commentary by your friends about your family.  You are thought of EVERY day.  Because you are family.  And today, I add the thousands of souls who perished - along with the multitude of those left behind who continue to grieve - to my reflective thoughts.  You are one, among many, but don't be offended if I don't single you out.

My comment was up for about 10 seconds.  And. Then. She. Deleted. It.

She texted our youngest sister: "I just deleted a comment she made on my post. Guess I'm gonna hear about that". 

I did try and call her, but my call went right to voicemail.  So I left this message:

I love you, but I believe your post today was totally disrespectful and inappropriate.  I found it important that I defend our family's honor. On the anniversary of such tragic events, it is not a time to be self-centric, when you have being alive to celebrate.  I hope I talk to you soon.

I've got two words for you sis:  You're Alive.

And here are two more: Thousands Aren't.

As if that wasn't enough, try this: Multitudes Grieve.

So in closing, here are my two final words: Getover Yourself.



Comments (8)

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i hate the facebook comment delete. Unless it's complete racist diatribe, i make a point to NEVER delete a comment, even if it bugs me.

Sounds to me like your sister could use a pair of big girl panties and a dose of maturity.
My recent post The Wheels on the Bus…
I know too many people who put passive aggressive, attention seeking status updates on FB. Weird that this is how we are starting to share and "communicate" with each other, even family.
Sorry to hear about this. Sisters should be friends.
My recent post Day 2 of the Blogger Challenge. You Need a Psychiatric Evaluation for Reading this Stuff.
How awful. I hate Facebook altogether. People try to talk about things on there that aren't meant for that particular medium. It's been my choice to avoid it, the good with the bad.
AAAAAAAAWE SNAP! First off, I say good for you for adding a bit of much needed prospective to the day. Sounds like she needed it. I am so glad your sister is alive. I am so glad you have the chance to fight with her and debate things via text, Facebook, or whatever. I'm glad you spoke your mind and I hope it seeps in and that at some point you two can have an open dialogue about the feelings she's having and why she responded to the day that way. But all in all, I hope she is aware just how lucky she is. Lucy to be ALIVE when others are not. Lucky to to have a Facebook and not a head stone. Lucky to have family "not call" as opposed to visiting her grave on this day. Family is complicated but a blessing!

Margaret (@goodbadfamily)
My recent post My Perfect Marraige
yeah...it sounds like she was begging for attention of some sort. hopefully you've been able to talk with her and get things figured out.

wm
WOW. Just...wow. Because she shouldn't be OK, right? Grr.
My recent post A Spork-tastic Day, Part UNO
everyone has one of those siblings who thinks its ALL about them. And if you don't think you have one?? It's you, dude.
My recent post Multi-vitamin Fail
every family has one.

*posts this comment on face book, then deletes any comments from my family related to it.*

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