Yeah. Good Times.: My scumbag brain returns

Tuesday, September 20, 2011

My scumbag brain returns

I'm never sure if I should just show you guys these (awesome) pictures without a narrative or if I should chat you up while I do it. Last time I introduced you to my scumbag brain I did it without any explanatory text, so this time I think I'm going to get all chatty 'n shit on your asses. Let me know which one you like better.

It was last Friday and I was walking the boys home from school, and I was really tired. You know those days when you're so tired that you feel like you could literally fall down and die? Die from being tired? I mean literally? Fall down? And die? That was the kind of day I was having, on Friday, coming home from school.....

The boys, however, had LOTS of energy; obnoxious amounts, in fact. Annoying, obnoxious amounts. I was miserable. All they could talk about was how much they couldn't wait to play Wii and who was going to play Wii first and Mama will you watch us play Wii and this is so exciting because it's Friday and no homework and we're going to play Wii when we get home!! YAYYYYY!!!! WIIIIII!!!!!!!!

Usually when I'm feeling that tired I sit there on the couch and I stare blankly at whatever they're doing, but this time I thought I'd take advantage of this Wii obsession. I gave them snacks and water and I went upstairs to lie the fuck down! YES!

I'm pretty sure that there is no better feeling in the world than when you're really tired and you slip into your comfy, comfy bed for a nap. Well, maybe an orgasm, but just barely....

Then, it happened, however: my brain turned on....

Because, you know, we live less than a mile away from the Hayward fault, which is so overdue for "The Big One" that at this point it's no longer a question of "if" the big one will hit, but when and exactly how big and how many people are going to die when it does? It could happen at any time. Any day. No matter where we are or what we're doing, or whether or not we have yet gotten around to attaching our large and heavy pieces of furniture which hold our televisions and our Wii consoles securely to the wall. And once I start thinking about these things, the game is over, I can never make my brain shut up once it gets going like this. Have I mentioned yet that I'm neurotic? Yeah, a few times....

Stupid brain.....

Comments (22)

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Stephi · 705 weeks ago

((hugs)) Stupid over tired brain!

My neurotic brain does similar fucked up shit! Generally when I'm driving though - stupid car wrecks of the past - I can be happily driving along, being all non-neurotic and such then it'll happen. Out of the blue my brain will pop up this stupid imagery that briefly makes my being think I just ran off the road & hit a tree or the asswipe flying up the curved hill, in my lane, actually hits me, etc...then I spend the next several minutes playing out in my head just how it could have happened and how it can't happen because I'm too important in the lives of too many people and then really start imagining what if I were to die, there'd be a whole slew of people that would just not be able to function...and well...now I have shared this and should crawl back into my hole of neurotic-ism.

Hope you've been able to get some rest since then and feel all sorts of jillsmosome - like awesome, but more so.
My recent post Engraved

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solodialogue 73p · 705 weeks ago

Brains are mean. They always mess with your sleep and then when you ask them for something? Forget it!
My recent post Echolalia: Seizure or Setback?

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Brandon · 705 weeks ago

Alcohol for everyone!!!

It will mellow them out, and help you sleep. Booze cures EVERYTHING!!! (please OH PLEASE know that I'm joking....)

My recent post Looks Like SOMEONE'S Got a Case of the Mondays!!

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Ryan @TWM · 705 weeks ago

I have the same affliction! But with my luck, I'll force myself downstairs only to have a child trip over MY foot and bust THEIR lip open.
My recent post The $2 lesson

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Amanda · 705 weeks ago

Having a brain sucks sometimes. I would've just gone and laid on the couch. Then I figure we'd all at least die together if there was an earthquake.

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Jenn@Fox in the City · 705 weeks ago

I so want to kick your scumbag brain in the nads! How dare it ruin a perfectly good opportunity to actually get some sleep . . . ah sleep . . . I miss sleep . . . one day we will sleep again . . . hopefully.

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Rards · 705 weeks ago

You should get rid of that giant fucking book case, it's obviously a menace. Maybe just buy a huge spring and superglue the TV on top of that.(You've seen that commercial with the guy who glued his hardhat to the steel beam, you KNOW that shit works!) Then when "The Big One"™®© hits, you'll just have a TV bouncing harmlessly like one of those jack-in-the-box(™®©?) heads. Who could be scared of that? Nobody, that's who.

Well, unless you're afraid of clowns...why the hell do clowns pop out of boxes, anyway? But you don't have that problem with TVs, like you might with boxes...unless there's a clown on TV when "The Big One"™®© hits, of course, which would really just be a case of super-bad timing. But you could fix that by running downstairs and pulling the power plug to the TV before things got out of hand.(what the hell else do you have to do when an earthquake hits, anyway...it's not like you can sleep when the freaking planet is trying to buck you like a bronco)

See? Solution for everything, now go to sleep!

6 replies · active 705 weeks ago

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jillsmo 103p · 705 weeks ago

RARDS! What, you just randomly make an appearance and then you're gone again???

Did you know that the guy who glued his hardhat to the steel beam was John Goodman?

True story.

Also: I'm afraid of clowns.

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@pugariffic73 · 705 weeks ago

Betcha a coke! it's not him!!!

We've done extensive research here and have concluded.. that is NOT John Goodman.

What say you!?!?

lol o.0
My recent post I HAVE to move on.. right?

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jillsmo 103p · 705 weeks ago

I can't believe you're questioning the "True story."

I SAID TRUE STORY!!! YOU CAN'T QUESTION THE TRUE STORY!!!!!

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Rards · 705 weeks ago

WE WANT OUR FREE NOT PEPSI!!!!!

Some delicious breads would be nice, too...delicious breads are always nice with not pepsi.

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Rards · 705 weeks ago

I'm never really "gone", only lurking...like a vicious dingo waiting to strike and steal someone's baby...only I'm not really a dingo, and I don't snatch babies, so...........okay, I don't know where that leaves me.

As for John Goodman being the superglue guy, I can find nothing to support that.(and I really don't know that superglue is THAT strong) But I did find John Goodman....AS A CLOWN! http://rookery.s3.amazonaws.com/953500/953896_382... Stay off my spring-TV if you know what's good for you, John Goodman!!!

ps: I thumbs-upped your comment. I don't know what that means, but I assume it's a good thing. I mean, it's a thumbs up, what the hell?

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jillsmo 103p · 705 weeks ago

I have a headache :(

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@CorinnePM · 705 weeks ago

Yep, sounds like mine. "Are the windows locked?" "Are the doors locked?" Is everything bolted down? (SoCal here.)

Damn brains. Really. I wish we could just be like Potato Heads and remove pieces of ourselves that we don't need at that moment. You know, brains, ears, uteruses.
My recent post Where I'm From

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jane cerva · 705 weeks ago

That's what we call, "Being too tired to sleep." Yes, it really happens. Or at least it happens to me...

A few weeks ago, I was at that level of tired, where I felt I had to consciously ensure that my lungs continued to breathe in and out, and my heart continued to beat. Just that tired.

It was awful.

So I decided to say, "I don't care that it's only 6:30 pm, I'm going to bed NOW!"

And then I could barely sleep.

Every time I dozed for even a few minutes, I'd wake up in a panic with some sort of disastrous image in my brain. Car problems. Horrible conversations with my mother. Financial catastrophes. Conviction that there was about to be an earthquake (which are nearly unheard of where I live). Just one crappy scenario after another would pop into my semi-sleeping brain, and I would wake up having to consciously breathe and make sure my heart was still beating.

Thank whatever powers there are in the universe that I didn't have to work the next day, because my brain didn't wind down enough to really allow me to sleep until the sun was coming up.

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andrea · 705 weeks ago

I think if you had sat on the couch, your brain might not have realized your intent and you might've tricked it and fallen asleep.Try that--act all casual like you're so wide awake and then...zzzzzzzzzzz....psyche scumbag brain!
My recent post Tuesday? Again?

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karen · 705 weeks ago

My scumbag brain did the same thing last night. Woke up at 4am for a potty break and then my brain just took off on some tangent about re-organizing my closet (WTF??). Took like an hour for me to shut it down again....stupid brain.
My recent post Wordless Wednesday

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justjenannhall 53p · 705 weeks ago

I must have a scumbag brain cuz mine does the exact same thing to me!

I freaking love your pictures.
My recent post Zen Blog Reading

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tazerwarriorprincess 25p · 705 weeks ago

I feel bad for laughing... but I'm totally laughing.

Stupid paranoia....
My recent post A Spork-Tastic Day, Part Deux

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Cheryl D. · 705 weeks ago

Wow, that's scary! My daughter had a hard time sleeping the other night, and she wouldn't even get out of bed to go potty because she was nervous a big earthquake would hit!
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