xmlns:og='http://ogp.me/ns#' Yeah. Good Times.: Dearly Beloved, We Are Gathered Together Today...

Friday, January 13, 2012

Dearly Beloved, We Are Gathered Together Today...

Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today, three bloggers together, to address a serious issue that has become so commonplace throughout social media for special needs parents and the special needs community as a whole, we aren't shocked when it happens anymore. Please welcome Jill from Yeah. Good Times., Lisa, the Yuckmouth Mommy from 7 Yuckmouths and Autism, and Caryn, from Living with Logan. This post will go live simultaneously on all three sites today, because we are united in our desire to get the word out. Please help us in this effort, and pass it along.

The issue, as you may have guessed, is the frequency with which the special needs community is getting scammed through false organizations and individuals, who prey on our desire to help our children. We've put together a little dialogue that we hope will be helpful in learning to protect ourselves as thoroughly as we protect our children. The truth of the matter is this: if we don't protect ourselves, no one else will. Each comment will be followed by the initials of the author, and we welcome comments and questions from all. Please be respectful in your comments, or they will be deleted. There is enough drama and cat fighting. We don't need more.

And now, welcome to our conversation!

1.  Do you think the Special Needs Parenting Community as a whole is vulnerable to cyber scammers?

Yes, I do. I think we are easily targeted for a number of reasons. We are fighters. We are strong. We have to be so, to advocate for our children. People desiring to scam us love this attribute, because they don’t have to teach us to work toward the goal. We are focused, as every parent is, in getting whatever our child/children needs. We hit so many dead ends, we are told “No” so many times in so many different ways that we love it when someone says yes. There is a veritable target on our backs. I don’t mean that we are stupid. Certainly we are not. We are intelligent, we work hard, and we fight for what we believe in. And, let’s face it, people. We like to talk. If we find something we think is awesome for our kids, it’s all over the twitter and the facebook the very same day. What scammer wouldn’t love any of that?! Not only that, those of us that blog are only too happy to blog about our good fortune, because we want others to benefit as well. This is a win/win for a scammer. People who will promote online, at their own expense of time and effort, with no cost to the scammer but one or two iPads or a couple of apps, and then they never have to make good again. They already have all the good exposure they need. It’s scary how easy we have made it for the slime balls of the internet. CH

2.  What are some “red flags” that somebody might be scamming you?

Generally, I follow the “if it sounds too good to be true, it usually is” rule. Someone asking you for money when offering a “free” product or service such as purchasing a raffle ticket or forking over a nominal fee to “keep your reservation valid” is a sign of a scam. Likewise, someone asking you to write a blog post, collect donations, or generate votes to qualify your child for a free service dog, for instance, is a sign of a scam. CH

Trust your instincts. If it doesn’t feel right to you, it’s likely that it isn’t, so ask questions. Who are these people? Where are they located? Do they have any other sources of funding? Do they have (valid) testimonials and references? A huge red flag is if you ask direct questions and consistently do not get direct answers. If they can’t provide you with valid financial information, or they refuse to provide any personally identifiable information about themselves: be careful. Scammers are like politicians; they will talk around the issue, touching on their key “talking points,” but they will rarely ever actually answer your question directly. A reputable organization will be easily able to provide you with whatever you need to know to prove their validity. Jill

Also, anybody who requires any money from you, in any form (i.e. directly from you, solicited by you, etc.) before you can proceed with an application process is definitely scamming you. Trustworthy organizations will not require that you pay to complete an application process. Jill

3.  How can you protect yourself?

I’m sorry, but someone offering a “free” iPad or service dog or therapy or miracle “cure” for autism just doesn’t ring like the real deal to me. I’m a BIG believer in doing my homework. Read the fine print. What strings are attached? What commitments are they asking from you? Are they registered as a 501 3(c)? If so, have they been reported at any time in any way? Are they registered with the BBB? Is it a company, foundation, or individual? Are they based in your country or somewhere you’ve never heard of in Bangladesh? Do they offer transparency if they are a donation based company? Will they provide statements to anyone who asks? Are the founders or other officials easily accessible to their followers by chat, message board, email, facebook, twitter, or corporate phone number? Is there a message board/review panel of any kind for feedback from people who have worked with this person or company in the past? Does the person or company bash other similar entities regularly? These are questions you should ask yourself before becoming involved with ANY internet based company or foundation. CH

4.  What to do when you have already been scammed, or private info has been published on social networking sites?

There are many ways to protect yourself on facebook and twitter. Both sites have very firm TOS (Terms Of Service) in place to protect their users, its just a matter of finding where to do all of this. LG

First you can report any and all comments you feel are attacking you in any way. You need to make sure that you first screen shot for proof later because once a comment or post is reported it is removed. I find it much easier to watch a video of what I should be doing and this google search has all the info for how to screen shot on various devices. LG

On twitter there is a way to report people twitter has a really handy page that is clear as how to report a number of violations of their TOS. In addition you have to give them the url to the post so make sure you click on details in the tweet, that will open to a new page and give you the url to give to twitter. LG

On Facebook you can find out lots about your account in your general account setting tab. From there click on security settings. On that page is a wealth of info in regards to what, when and who has had access to your account that you may not have known about. LG

From that page it is easy to click on the help button towards the bottom of the page, there you can report violations from harassment, to copyright infringement, and intellectual property infringement. Because even as a fan page you have rights on facebook just like everyone else. LG

For more information on cyber crimes, how to report them, and definitions of cyber crimes, please visit the following websites:

Cyberstalking: What it is and what you can do as a victim

Computer Crime and Intellectual Property Section of the United States Department of Justice

What Are Your Legal Rights?

Image in this post from Google images



Comments (18)

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I notice that you are talking about service dogs -- if this is in reference to the Pepsi Refresh Project I have an inside source (with the company who administrates the grants) who was asked about the charity not providing the service dogs when they were promised. The answer was: We (the company, Global Giving) asked the charity to change the terms of their grant to purchase tangible things (i.e. leashes, new cages, etc.) instead of using the grant money to pay the salaries of those who would train these dogs. The charity was given the choice to comply with Global Giving's wishes or lose the grant money. It is unclear whether GG was aware that 10 families were already promised dogs. I am not sure why the charity in question did not come clean with the families meant to get the dogs, probably out of embarassment, guilt or both; but it seems to me that in this case that the charity was strong armed into making a bait and switch with their grant money. And Pepsi still got all of that advertising and got to play the part of great helper of the community, so what do they really care if 10 families got screwed in the end?
5 replies · active 687 weeks ago
Interesting...
That just made me sick to my stomach.
My recent post Dearly Beloved, We Are Gathered Here Today...
The Pepsi thing caused me to literally cry, especially since I know what a difference these service dogs can make for some people.

The fear of a scam is one reason we researched a number of service dog organizations for months before going with 4 Paws for Ability. They are transparent, registered 501 3(c), and when I asked about the ONE major complaint I found they were not only honest, but never verbally bashed the woman once while talking to me.

We have since hard more nightmare stories from other organizations or individuals scamming and I and so glad we took our time, followed or instincts, and asked a lot of questions!
My recent post Magpie Waits
It's incredibly frustrating that while they're trying to save face because they didn't research enough, these families are wasting precious time they could have been using to fundraise or research real, live charities. And when concerned parents asked GG about their concerns, the parents were told "after all, it's not that hard to train a service dog," and "it's an HONOR to work with this organization," and when it was suggested they might want to verify that this was, in fact, an actual organization, "we can't be sending people to check on every grant." So these big guns voluntarily put their names alongside a scamartist. They lent their credibility and because they're too stubborn or proud to admit they could have possibly done better, the families have wasted so much time doubting their instincts and feeling stupid.
My recent post Update: We Will Not Go Quietly
It's sad, really. Because Pepsi could definitely easily just fix it (and YES I KNOW THEY ARE NOT LEGALLY REQUIRED TO DO SQUAT). The money wouldn't be missed to them at all and they would come out of this mess looking good. And don't even get me started on the fact that they happily posted AFA's "press release" as promotional material that included all 10 kids' names, the parents' names, their locations, their diagnoses, and the little fact that they were prone to wandering...without any consent. All i'm saying is that they need to look at the refresh project and see what works/doesn't work. there are still good people/organizations/charities/schools out there that could sooooo benefit from a grant. Just do your dang homework adn don't lie about it when you dont. Sorry. RANT OVER. for now.
My recent post Update: We Will Not Go Quietly
I've been following the service dog thing off and on.

We have a case manager who handles a lot of that stuff for us. If we apply for a grant, for example, it's because she's found one that's applicable and gotten us paperwork to fill out. But not everybody lives in PA, nor has a case worker.
My recent post The Night Before Christmas: I Know. . .
I'm glad you mentioned the votes thing. I saw a thing for ipads for military kids, so I signed up for more information. The email came, and it went to my husband's military email (that's how they verified service), and he said they wanted us to get votes. I told him to delete it. That sent a huge red fag. My child's need for a device shouldn't be based on a popularity contest. We get targeted for scams a lot being a military family too. It's sad what people will do. I'm just glad there are more good people we've come across than not.
Important. Will share.
Sorry. In all that I forgot to say:

Jill, Lisa, and Caryn...As painful as it is, this is absolutely necessary conversation and we appreciate you stepping up and kickin' it off! GREAT JOB!
My recent post Update: We Will Not Go Quietly
Thank you for posting this. I'm having a hard time trying to find the right words here but my general gist is that the people who prey on families trying to find help for their child is reprehensible. And those families are so desperate, they don't do the due diligence or their homework because they so want something, hell anything that may help their child. I've been there. And you think because it's a charity or they say they have a 501c3 that it legit. Sigh.

Thank you for taking the lid off of some of the scams that are out there. And taking a stand for others.
My recent post Quiet Friday turned into a not so quiet Friday.
HA! Maybe I'll work on one today ;)
only if *I* get to be the one riding the broom!!! ;) Love ya, babe.
My recent post Dearly Beloved, We Are Gathered Here Today...
Elizabeth L. Oala's avatar

Elizabeth L. Oala · 689 weeks ago

This is a wonderful article, full of great advice. It's truly a sad thing that there are so many people who want to take advantage of others, especially children, and even more so those with special needs. I'd like to suggest that anyone who's in Ohio, who needs help, or is looking for an organization to work with, check out The Hattie Larlham Foundation. They've been servicing the MR/DD population for 50 years, doing wonderful things, and continue to grow. They have the main "hospital" where they have children and young adults living, it also has it's own school (including a specialized preschool for children with Autism). They also have several "businesses" for their clients to work at, including Cafes and Doggie Daycares.
I know all of this, because Hattie was my grandmother. In fact, I just went to their 50th celebration in Cleveland this past October, where some wonderful people were honored. If you'd like to check out their website and services, please visit www.HattieLarlham.org
Thank you for bringing much needed attention to this issue.
Elizabeth Larlham Oala
Oh yes, LURV that wonderful word CURE
My recent post Why Does This Bother You?

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