xmlns:og='http://ogp.me/ns#' Yeah. Good Times.: Sorry, Google, but you brought this on yourself

Thursday, July 7, 2011

Sorry, Google, but you brought this on yourself

Everybody on Twitter has been talking about Google Plus. They want to know where their invites are, and if they're on it, they want to know who else is in their timeline, or something, whatever it's called. There's so much hype! This thing is HUGE. I have no idea what it's all about, but I'll be honest... I'm a little pissed about that. Why did Google reject me? Doesn't Google think I'm good enough to be on their whatever this new thingy is? I think I'm good enough, Google. I think I'm perfect for your new whatever this thingy is. My self esteem has actually been more than a little bit affected by this rejection, I'll be honest with you all. This has been painful. Very very painful, for the entire 20 minutes now that I've been thinking about it.

Not only do I have to live with the sting of this rejection, but four different twitter buddies have now said they have sent me Google+ invitations... and nothing has actually arrived in my inbox. NOTHING. Four different people, Google! FOUR, and yes, I have a Google profile and YES it is public (I don't know why that's necessary, but I made SURE of it). I can't help but think that this is also personal, Google. Not only did you intentionally exclude from the awesome new fun thingybob dealie when it came out, but now you won't even let other people invite me to the, I guess, fun.

Well, I'm sorry, Google, but this is unacceptable. UNACCEPTABLE. Here I've been loyally using your free services for years now, and this is how you treat me?? This simply will not stand, Google. It. Will. Not. Stand. You have forced me into action because of your horrible, horrible mistreatment.

I officially announce a new project that I'm launching! I call it jillsmo equals.... and EVERYBODY is invited. (Hubs said I should call it Yeah. Good Times. Equals, but.... I like this one better). I don't care if you're uncool. I don't care if you're not "hip" or "with it." I don't care if "I don't even know who the fuck you are." I don't care!! EVERYBODY gets in! Nobody will be excluded from jillsmo equals. NOBODY.

Look! I made a logo:



Okay, so... now all I need is to figure out what the hell jillsmo equals is. Oh, and I probably need a programmer or something, you know, to actually make it happen. So I guess I'll get to work on that. And by "get to work on that" naturally I mean I'm going to make myself a drink and just wait for somebody to come and do it for me. If that doesn't happen, then, well... fuck it, I guess.

Note: Anybody who was talking to me on Twitter last night will know that I actually did get an invite to Google Plus; actually I got 5 of them. You don't get an email notification, is the thing, you just go to plus.google.com and as long as you have a Google profile and it is set to public, you should be able to get right in. 

Note #2: Okay, apparently you don't even need an invite anymore, you just need a Google account. But fuck it, goddammit!! I already made the fucking logo and I wrote this whole post, so... GAH!! I'm posting it, anyway. There's no doubt that jillsmo= will be bigger and better than Google+ anyway, right? So I'm still doing it!!! See previous, though, re: I need a programmer and a clue.



Comments (40)

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Did you just see my tweet
I've been rejected by Google Plus, like a girl waiting outside a club, trying to get in
WTF is GooglePlus, what does it do, and why are we all breathlessly awaiting invitations to play along? I'm just happy with my regular strength Google cooperates and let's me leave comments on my own blog without a fight... and lately even THAT'S a struggle. Anyone else get cock-blocked by Google on their own blog? Didn't think so...

Lemme know when Jillsmo= is up and running, 'cause whatever it is, I need one. Or two. And an operations manual. In Engrish. If the Google Gods are willing, I will now leave this comment.
My recent post A SQUATLO STORY: NUMBER FORTY-FIVE "THE ACCIDENT PRONE CHILD"
It is super confusing. I am glad you were there last night to help me get it set up. My brother kept saying he was sending them to me, but I never got them. Now I know when I invite people to tell them to go straight to the log-in.
My recent post Drinking To Decorate
Google Plus?!? WTF is that?!? I just got Google Chrome up and running and really, I don't get it. At All.

And Jillsmo = tight abs. I don' t know why but I imagine you have tight abs and if you don't---lie.
My recent post More than shells.
1 reply · active 716 weeks ago
Um. Yes. I have tight abs. Yes.
I'm in. And yeah, so far on the +, you're my only friend. So far, NOT impressed.

That, and facebook just teamed up with skype. I love that. WHAT NOW, GOOGLE?

My recent post Another fun internet tool: The Political Compass
1 reply · active 716 weeks ago
so far google + is meh
Okay, I don't even know what the hell Google + is! However, if it is going to be all snobby like that I say, Fuck it and go with Jillsmo = !!

Oh, would someone mind telling me what this whole Google + thing is?! Thanks.
My recent post Sex-Ed . . . the Pre-school Version
1 reply · active 716 weeks ago
Yeah! Be snobby!! YEAH!
I prefer jill= to Google+. Whatever the hell that is which I also did NOT get an invite to.
My recent post Writer's Workshop: Dear Obsession - No, Not Mine
Jillsmo = is the future! I just got rejected by Google Plus on your link. Nasty old Google. Sounds like a pimped up version of FB to me...
My recent post Delays.
I'm so lame, I have no idea what this is....maybe I should use the Twitter more. Either way, I must be rejected too.
My recent post Yes, I am an attention whore, now leave me alone
i dont know what google plus is but i do know i would surely be rejected
yeah, I was invited to google plus and now what? everyone I stalk is on FB or twitter...so I'm waiting for something spectacular from them now
and Jillsmo=fucking awesome
I hadn't even heard of Google Plus until I googled it. Still confused. Gawd I'm old.
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You just made my bladder explode with laughter. And I totally want a jillsmo= I don't know what the f*ck google plus is, but I know jillsmo= is a helluva lot cooler.
Silly lady. I went, they're temporarily over capacity. I hadn't heard of it till yesterday.
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Handflapper's avatar

Handflapper · 716 weeks ago

I thank you for the invite, but really? I need another social networking site to fritter away time on? I am not able to shower now because I have no towels and I'm not doing a load of towels in the wash because I'm reading your blog and commenting. Buti will totally join jillsmo=. I can just kill my facebook account. It's boring the shit out of me anyway.
My recent post Hey, everybody! I’m a guest poster! I’m like a REAL BLOGGER now.
Don't forget to make sure you also offer jmail and a browser named something like Jillsmo Chrome. Although, don't use Chrome since they did. Oh I got it - Jillsmo Aluminum. Yes, perfect.
SarcasmInAction's avatar

SarcasmInAction · 716 weeks ago

I STILL DON'T KNOW WHAT GOOGLE + IS!!!!
And I totally meant to yell that.
Also, I think the answer to jillsmo= is AWESOMESAUCE!
Hey kids! google+ is just like facebook except better apparently . I am on there but it is so lonely. I want to thank google for not allowing me to invite any of my friends.
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Well, duh. Jillsmo=Good Times! Yeah! Wait, that kind of makes you sound easy. You're ok with that, right? I am gonna write the best fucking guest post EVAH!
My recent post Haterz B Hatin'; Part 2 (Worldwide, YO!)
I've been on Google+ for a couple of days now...but I'm predicting that jillsmo= will totally take over and turn it into Google-
I check my google plus every hour and nothing. I am the ultimate reject. Have not slept for days because of it. Will you be my +1 or have you moved on now that you got 5 invites?
i can't my invites to work, so I really suck.
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Oh shit - you're 'after the fact' additions are fucking priceless.
Damn you, Google!
My recent post They Said It Best
I didn't even know there was a Google + until I saw your rants last night. LOL Still don't know what it's all about.
K A B L O O E Y's avatar

K A B L O O E Y · 716 weeks ago

Don't know and deciding not to care. I cant even muster the time to tweet regularly enough. And I keep forgetting to direct them to the specific person I'm answering. So I don't need another social media thing to
1) make me aware of my technical inadequacies
2) make me aware of my lack of social standing
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Really funny post! I didn't realize you didn't need an invite anymore!

Ah fuck it, I barely have time for FB or Twitter as it is!

Again, great post!
My recent post Little Bit Lazy
See, I thought it was called Google Circles. I didn't get in either. And when one of my clients told me that their company social media guy got them in the "back door" I was all kinds of offended. Then I read your post that said you can just go there now, so I went, and it still tells me they have too many people right now and I'll have to wait. Just stamp REJECT on my forehead ;)
My recent post For Sale - Cheap
This google plus crap. klout plus crap. i can't keep up. nor do i wanna. but i WILL totally get on board your jillsmo= once you figure it out.
My recent post Friday Flip Offs! It's time
Fuck Google+, that's old news. I am ALL ABOUT Jillsmo=. It's where the cool kids are.

Fucking Google.
My recent post Week in Review - It's Friday I'm in Love
I was rejected by Google + but I have been a long time member of Jillismo=. The perks are great.. Lot's of updates, it's completely interactive and personalized. Also from what I've heard she has awesome tight abs.
lance*69 is about to launch. It will have the R.E.M. song as it's theme and it will be invite only. You have to hate Nickelback, be able to sing 3 Clash songs, and never use emoticons. I expect membership at 4, tops.
google plus seems lame so far.

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