xmlns:og='http://ogp.me/ns#' Yeah. Good Times.: Those Mama Bear instincts

Tuesday, March 22, 2011

Those Mama Bear instincts

The other day I was dropping the kids off at school; we were, once again, sent to the cafeteria/auditorium because it was raining, and I left Child 1 where he was, happily staring at the clock in the middle of complete and total chaos. I walked by a group of kids and I heard one of them say my son's name. I looked over at him and he had this little smile (I'm sure it was actually a "smirk") on his face and he was looking at another kid. They must have felt my eyes on them because they both stopped and looked at me (and the smirk disappeared).

I have no idea what he said other than to say my son's name, but my mind went to all the worst places, of course. They said he was weird, they said they didn't like him, they said there was something wrong with him, they said they were going to shun him and bully him and they hated him and they were going to kick his ass.....

Whatever. I have no idea. I didn't say a word and just left the room and went about my business. Child 1, of course, was completely oblivious to the whole thing. He just stood there, looking at the clock, flapping his hand in front of his face, whispering to himself about trains or elevators or whatever. He was completely fine. Nobody was getting bullied here; the whole thing happened inside my head, but I swear to god I wanted to fucking kick their little asses. I wanted to take my hands to their throats and throttle the shit out of them. What are you saying about my kid?? Yeah, I know he's different; I know he's weird, but you'd better fucking be nice to him or I'll kick your ass, you little shits! I wanted to grab my kid, run the fuck out of that place and take him home where he would be safe from bullies forever. But, that's not realistic, obviously, and it's not even good for him. He needs to make his way in the world and he needs to figure out how to do it on his own and I was the only one there who had a problem.

I still felt it, though. That protective instinct. You hurt my kid and I'll fucking take you down. When Child 1 was born I had postpartum depression and I wasn't sure I would ever get there. I'm sure now, though. Damn sure.


On a lighter note, I was drawn by the Animated Woman!! It's so exciting!! Not everybody gets the honor of being drawn and in this case I entered a contest and didn't even WIN, but my number was drawn randomly and after she drew me she drew me!! She made 2 different versions, one with the hat (at the link) and one without, which she emailed me separately (below). I LOOOOOOOOOOOOOVE it. Love, love, LOVE!!!

THANK YOU!!! You can follow her on Twitter at @LittleAnimation, and you should, because she's exceptionally talented and it's so much fun to see what she comes up with. She's also the brains behind BlueTick, an awesome new meme that's been taking over Twitter. I'm verified! Are you??




Comments (28)

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Oh, hell yes. Love that pic of you. Of course, I think your shirt should have a Steal Your Face on it.
Mama bear? Oh, yeah. I've got that. I will take those motherfuckers out.
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It's so difficult sometimes holding yourself back from saying things when something happens to your kid. Unfortunately, it gets worse before it gets better.

Good luck!
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Tracy (@calormom)'s avatar

Tracy (@calormom) · 731 weeks ago

Love this post! Love the drawing. We can all relate to that mama bear with our kids. Sounds like even if they did say something wrong your little guy handled it awesome. Getting bullied because he is different is one of my biggest fears for my son as he grows. I will have this same reaction and hopefully will be able to keep it to myself like you did. :0)
I love your pic!!! You need to use it for everything now!! LOL!

And I probably would have done the same thing if it were my kid. Kids are just mean. And for no good reason other than they can be.
Oh I've got that too. Every time I am out with my oldest around her peers I am constantly on the lookout for any offenders who I need to stare down. I'm pretending that my stare means something to them of course. Wish we could protect them from everything forever.
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You are mom... hear you roar!!! I know that feeling. The feeling that everyone is looking at your kid because they are a little different. Makes you wanna stop and say "WHAT"... You stay on guard that's what good mom's do.
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I'll tell you something in all honesty...when your kid is really screwed up like mine...wheelchair, brain fried, etc....kids treat them a lot better than the kids like yours who look "normal"' but have unusual behaviour. I do not envy your situation, but hope that the kids have been together long enough to treat your guy well, or at least to leave him alone. We're all mama bears aren't we? Love, love the drawing!
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I don't blame you at all . That's the momma in ya. I have had my moments confronting kids and they were not pretty. I can recall a short while ago threatening to bust a cap in some teen thugs ass. But hey My kid is safe.
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Brandon.in.Idaho's avatar

Brandon.in.Idaho · 731 weeks ago

Nothin says lovin from mama more than her kicking a gaggle of small children's asses, just to keep you safe.
It's amazing how quickly the rage can just overcome you. I would have felt exactly the same if I were in your position.
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How fun! I love the drawn you! Of course, I only know you as a cartoon character, but this is an incredibly fun version of you! Congrats!

I know that mama bear instinct way too well! I have a hard time walking on as you did though! I still tend to get my claws out. The principal is tired of all the carnage. Hehe!
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Look at you girl! She really dolled you up... Longer hair, a little makeup, bigger smile. Very impressive.

Good thing that smirk got wiped off before you had to do it yourself! If you ever need backup, I'll come running! (cuz I'm a little scared of you too!)
I disagree with the comment that you were the only one with a problem because you are Child 1's mother. You are doing (or wanting to do) what mother bears, tigers, lions and people all want do. Protect and defend your child at all costs. You are doing right by your kid wanting to defend him.

The ones with the problems? The smirkers and I totally want to go to the school and knock the little punks off their thrones and show them what it feels like to push around anyone who even THINKS smirky thoughts toward someone who is weaker in any way.
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Your glare probably did more to protect child #1 than you'll ever know. My mom would put the laser eye on another kid in a heartbeat, and it must have been enough to keep me from getting hounded too often when I was little...
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Oh, girlfriend, I have been there. Ted has been teased and kinda bullied at his preschool. His FUCKING PRESCHOOL, for Chissake. I have had some very uncharitable thoughts about those little rat bastards, the teachers and the entire universe, lemme tell you. I know who the dickwads are who teased and questioned my little man, and I do give those punks the MOM LOOK every single time I see them. I'm on to you, you little ass wipes.

And anyway, preschoolers - ya'll shit yourselves still on occassion, piss your beds, eat your toe jam, etc. Who the FUCK are you to judge my wee man?? C'mon...let's take this outside.
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I generally hate kids, and on a daily basis come into contact with ones that need a good ass whooping, and those aren't even the ones giving K a hard time...if I saw (or imagined) something like that happening...yeeeaaah....who's gonna bail me out?
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there is nothing quite as formidable as "the look"--i employed it in my classroom numerous times, and there is not quite as satisfactory as watching a smirk disappear. (and as i was teaching teenagers--nothing quite so frightening as when it didn't work! yikes!)

But seriously, imma get arrested some day for dropping a kid if i catch him or her mocking my boy. They'd better band together or be quick. Just sayin.
I so feel you on this one. My kid looks typical, and is a high functioning Aspie, but still...different. It sort of hurts more, because he's with all the NT kids, but his differences become obvious quickly. It sucks, and I want to smack a kid almost every day. Baby stepping to graduation, baby stepping to graduation...
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I used to get defensive AT GYMBOREE when the other kids would call Moe a baby, just because he wasn't walking yet. Even though he was way older than them. He was maybe 15 months old. Can't wait for kindergarten.

Great new pic! Adorable :)
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I couldn't even imagine how unbelievably steamed & upset I would feel in that situation.
Sorry you even had to feel that type of hurt for your child, even if you weren't sure. Kids or not, I'd want to ring their ill-mannered lil necks too.

I LOVE the drawing, btw!! How incredibly freakin' awesome sauce!!
So there with you. Hopefully that [plus everyone above] means this is a completely normal, natural feeling and not that I am borderline paranoid-bat shit crazy. Not that THAT would change anything, of course.

My recent post Hear me roar
I can help.
I have a crowbar and highheels.
Between the both of us? We can take them DOWN.
Fuck yeah!

W00t W00t for picture!
Vodka Calling's avatar

Vodka Calling · 731 weeks ago

Found you on twitter, or someone directed me to your blog, can't remember. Love this post. I have been the exact same way. My kids are weird, like really weird, I am always on the lookout for the little punks that like to talk smack. Good job mamma bear!!
Drawing is awesome. And FUCK YEAH! Rock on Mama Bear! Rock on!
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Love your animation. Congratulations on the random win. Glad to read there was no actually bullying going on. That protective instinct sure gets strong.
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My son isn't autistic, but he can be a bit socially awkward. When someone picks on him, my first instinct is to scare the living shit out of them. I totally get the roaring mama bear instinct. I try to just teach him how to handle a-holes in life. Okay, sometimes I step in (just did recently) and put the other kid in his place. Mostly I try to encourage him to stand up for himself. *takes off boxing gloves*
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One of the proudest moments I had with my son was when he was acting like himself (he isn't autistic) . A little girl came up to him and said "You're weird" out of nowhere. He wasn't bothering her, talking to her or anything, just being himself. His response "I know" and had a big grin. The world is tough and it's great to watch him learn to be strong for himself. She walked away. My son's a lot more social adept than I was at that age, and I hope he continues to be so.
I was drawn too! Doesn't it make you feel happy?

I know what you are saying. The first time my daughter came home and said that people made fun of her shoes and wouldn't play on the teeter totter with her, I thought I was going to kick their tiny 5 year old asses. All the while screaming "You will get your ASS ON THE TEETER TOTTER you little shit!". I'm glad I didn't, because I bet jail sucks.

You are right, we have to let them make their way through the world. And it will involve hurt and humiliation. And that is so very hard to accept.
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