xmlns:og='http://ogp.me/ns#' Yeah. Good Times.: My kid is crazy & things we did today

Monday, February 28, 2011

My kid is crazy & things we did today

I'm combining two unrelated topics into one post today, because that's just how I roll, baby. Also I think I've been posting too much. I've posted 51 times in the month of February! There are only 28 days in the month. If I were able to do math, I could tell you how many times a day I've been posting, but, ehhhh. I'm lazy, so you figure it out.  But don't let that stop you from voting for me. No, I'm serious. Seriously.

On the other hand, I'm sorry, I don't usually do politics, but this is pissing me off. To all of you who watched and enjoyed the Oscars last night, did you know that almost every single person who won and accepted an award last night is a member of a union? Do you watch movies? Do you enjoy talent? And the fashion? Do you have an opinion about what's going on in Wisconsin right now? Think about it.

The following stories are brought to you by the oligarchy in which we live. Thank you, rich people and corporate owners of America, who still allow me to have a computer and an internet connection. For now......

STORY THE FIRST

Tyger (formerly known as Child 2; this is going to take some time to get used to) is totally fucking nuts. We're hanging out, doing, uh... stuff?... and I think we were fake fighting or something? We do that sometimes. Fake fight. Anyway, he says "If you don't stop I'm going to have to start calling you 'Chicken Broth'!"

Chicken Broth? Yeah, I have no idea. But, I tell him "well, if I'm 'Chicken Broth' that makes you 'Mini Chicken Broth'."

"Mini Chicken Broth!!"

He's delighted.

And then he proceeds to name all of our cats in a similar manner.

Spike is Tiny Chicken Broth

Spot is Tiny Chicken Broth with Spots

McDougal is Scaredy Chicken Broth

Charlie is Fat Chicken Broth ("because he's fat")

And then he starts running back and forth and SCREAMING "TINY CHICKEN BROTH! TINY CHICKEN BROTH!! AAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!! TINY CHICKEN BROTH! TINY CHICKEN BROTH!!"

Seriously, man, the kid is fucking nutballs.

I don't know where he gets it from.

Also: here's the library book he checked out this week:

Seriously? Enough already, kid. Come on.

STORY THE SECOND

We took the boys out on their scooters today. Apparently there's this jogging/biking path that goes through town. Seriously, I've lived here for 12? years and I can't believe I never knew about this thing. It's perfect for scootering, particularly since it's right underneath the BART tracks.

They were fucking adorable. (Can I say "fucking" here?) They were so fucking adorable. And Bart (Child 1. Seriously, man, this is really hard) is surprisingly good at scootering. This is a kid with hyptertonia who will NEVER be an athlete, but I was damn impressed at how gracefully he rode his scooter. Considering that they were Hanukkah gifts, and it's only March, I'm incredibly impressed at how good he's gotten at it.

Tyger was doing his best to keep up with his brother, but he is shorter and clumsier and it was so awesome how hard he was trying. This is the first time ever that I've seen them have one of those "big/little brother" moments where the little one wants to be like the big one. It was very very sweet.

"Wait for me, Bart!"

This is perfect because you can just make out the BART logo on the train

OH MY GOD IT'S A BART TRAIN! IT'S A BART TRAIN! LOOK MAMA IT'S A BART TRAIN!!!!!!!!



Comments (22)

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Yeah. You post way to fucking much. No way I can be a good bloggy friend and comment on all that shit. Not enough hours in my day woman.

The Chicken Broth thing is hysterical!! Kids are indeed fucking weridos.

And SCORE on seeing the Bart train!
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1 reply · active 734 weeks ago
You're supposed to be my fairy blog mother, too.

You suck at that.
The complete randomness of Chicken Broth is ann allegoricak reference to the times in which we live, right? Oh, wait...wrong blog.

Yeah, your kids are pretty damn funny. Something tells me you spend a lot of your days fondly shaking your head with a bemused look on your face. And then saying "fuck".
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1 reply · active less than 1 minute ago
I do. I say "Dude, this kid is nuts" a lot.

And he says "Dude, my mom is nuts" a lot, too
*allegorical* FUCKING iPad!!! How can I be a smartass wi TYPOS??
1 reply · active 734 weeks ago
You still manage to pull it off
I love your comment about the oscars and the unions. I feel the same way about players unions in professional sports. They make 40 gajillion a year, and I don't hear anyone really pissing and moaning about them...
so Child 2 was Tyger than he was Mini Chicken Broth...this is going to take some time for me
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1 reply · active 734 weeks ago
I know, it's all very confusing
Those pics are sweet. Looks like they had a great time. I commend the creative faculties of your child for coming up with "Mini Chicken Broth." My kid just wants to name everything after himself, which is not so original!!
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1 reply · active 734 weeks ago
He's learning to pull stuff out of his ass just like his mom!

*sniff* so proud
Your kids are adorable! The chicken broth thing cracks me up. Our three year old twins will come up to me and say, "I'm gonna scramble YOUR eggs!" Thankfully, they only punch Mr. BFG in the gut.
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1 reply · active 734 weeks ago
Damn, that's a REALLY good point! Maybe I don't post enough?
Wonder what would happen if you mentioned there was beef and vegetable broth out there....oh yeah, your kids are frigging cute!
those are some pretty cute kids there Chicken Broth. Kosher, I'm assuming? ;)
1 reply · active 734 weeks ago
Oh, yeah, we definitely keep kosher in this house. And now, if you'll excuse me, I need to go make bacon cheeseburgers for dinner.....
I guess you wouldn't believe me if I told you that "Chicken Broth" is my middle name. Any way, how did you post that many times in one month? You're a freakin' machine!
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love the story and pics
love the story...

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