xmlns:og='http://ogp.me/ns#' Yeah. Good Times.: How jillsmo deals with a canvasser: A one act play.

Tuesday, April 19, 2011

How jillsmo deals with a canvasser: A one act play.

The scene: 

Downtown Oakland, a busy street corner. It is raining.

The characters:

Our Heroine: jillsmo, dressed as though she's going to the beach, and if she were a person who didn't hate the fucking beach. NO, she didn't see the weather report before she left the house this morning, so quit fucking asking her! She is hurrying to get some coffee in order to keep herself alive and get back to her client's office. Said client is getting ready for an audit and jillsmo's mind is completely wrapped up in audit-type things. jillsmo's internal dialogue is represented below in red and italics.

The Bad Guy (or whatever the scripty-ish term is for "The Bad Guy." jillsmo should probably ask Emily before she posts this. Ehhh. jillsmo doesn't feel like doing any extra research for this post): A bearded dude with a clipboard. He probably works for Greenpeace; jillsmo doesn't know or care.

As we begin, we see our heroine standing on the corner, holding her beloved coffee, wearing a t-shirt, Birkenstocks and no socks, getting wet, waiting for the light to change. Bearded dude with clipboard approaches, and.....


jillsmo: ... so I would need to debit that equity account 8200 so that the

Bearded Dude: Hi! Do you have a minute for the environment?

jillsmo: numbers would match, but then Hi. I'm really sorry, I don't right now. I'd need to credit the revenue account so that

Bearded Dude: Did you know that millions of Americans have been put at risk by the inherent dangers of nuclear power?

jillsmo: it would equal the 10,000 that we reported, but  Yeah, you know, I totally support what you do but I just don't have time right now, I'm sorry  I don't think we actually have the backup for the original 8200

Bearded Dude: Did you also know that radiation from the Japanese nuclear disaster is in the milk you're drinking today?

jillsmo: and even if we had the backup I don't know how to make the liability account  You're starting to annoy me and you need to go away match the statement that they're going to want to see

Bearded Dude: ...

The light finally changes and our heroine crosses the street and walks away.