The Dive Bar Welcomes: Manda

Today we welcome Manda, who blogs at Misadventures in Life and Such. And OMG, sorry, but before we get to your rant, Manda, can we please first appreciate this drawing of yours?

Holy FUCK that's awesome!!! Anyway.... here's Manda. YAY!

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My big sister. She is kinda awesome in a "I'm three years older then you but I still talk to you like you're 4" way. But this isn't really about my sister. Its about her lame ass piece o shit husband. There really is a special place in hell for him. First of all, my sister is adorable and pretty and blond, my total opposite in looks and personality. So it really shouldn't have surprised any of us when she started dating this dude in a trench coat when she was 17. He told us right off he was a born again christian, aspired to be "The Crow" and wouldn't date a girl with shorter hair then him. He kept his own hair pulled back in a pony tail that he never takes out, even to wash his hair. Eew. So after the normal screaming and crying and fighting my sister moved in with him, got all knocked up and then he brutally attacked her with a carving knife leading her to run away to live with relatives, my mom to tell my BIL that Jess lost the baby, and the birth of their little girl at my dad's house in Wisconsin.

That was the abbreviated version.

So the baby is born, we're all living in Pennsylvannia and here comes BIL crawling back. My sister so smitten, didn't even mind that every time she called his house a different tired sounding girl would answer the phone. So they got back together. Silly Jess. Various things happen, she gets pregnant, finds used condoms in his truck, catches him with the babysitter. All the while working her ass off in a pizza place while he is a Paperboy (excuse me paper DELIVERY PERSON). So when finding out her husband is cheating on her? Marries him. Fucking marries him. So for the count, they have 2 kids and his daughter from a previous relationship so 3 little girls total and then my sister finds out she had Pulmonary Hystiocytosis. A fucking disease so rare that Johns Hopkins doesn't know what to do about it. They tell her they'd be surprised if she lives until she's 35.

So BIL tells her its stupid to do treatment and since he's so smart and god and all with his framed GED she listens to him and proceeds to work herself to near death and attempt to repopulate the world with devils spawn (actually all her kids are really really effin cute and sweet but still). So BIL starts openly seeing a girl from his past, Angie, who is "christian". She starts sending Jess emails about how she should step aside and blah blah, but BIL wants his harem. Angie wouldn't actually SLEEP with BIL until he's divorced but remained confident through Jess's 3rd pregnancy and was even allowed to name this daughter. So on they go, Jess enjoying that she's "winning" over Angie because BIL will sleep with her.. and since yah know how picky he's been in the past about where he sticks it that must mean he loves her. In here BIL made Jess quite her job because she needed to be spending more time with the children.. Yep. For a month. Then told her that she'd have to leave if she didn't find a NEW job because now she was spending too much time with the children. So she got another job, loved it, was promptly promoted to manager, found out she was pregnant with number 4. A boy this time, so she was promised she could get her tubes tied and be done with the broodmare thing.

So now that she's pregnant with number 4 Angie leaves because ya know... getting the girl he was going to leave pregnant a fourth time is kind of just rubbing some cleaning solvent in the wound at this point. So at 25 my sister has had 4 kids, and one step kid. Awesome. The new baby being a boy doesn't bring the promised tube tying though. But BIL does kick my sister out of the house. (Prompting my mom and I to step in and look up every legal thing we can to get the kids the fuck out of that house but Jess said no, they needed their father.) So. She left him for a month. Got told by 9 different councilors that she was an EXTREME abuse case and this shit was only going to get worse. She got back together with him, because she was pregnant. Again. 26 with 5 pregnancies. And then he made her quit her job. Her job with insurance. And steady large pay check. And people who cared about her. And she's just home getting bigger with their second boy.

Because of her illness her teeth are gone. She gets pneumonia every fucking spring and summer. And those poor kids. I want to kill my BIL. I know my sister is to blame too. I hate her as well. But I know that she's dumb enough to listen to whoever she loves and right now she loves The Beast. The shit head. The douche. I hope his truck falls on him while hes working on it. I hope I catch him wailing on her sometime so I can rip his pony tail out of his greasy head. Most of all I hope that if my sister is really dieing from this illness she'll wake up and realize she doesn't NEED that shit and she can take all the kids and run and someone will love her and take care of her, even if it is just her mom and baby sister. We love her. We will take care of her. Goddamn it.

Oh on a side note, one of the reasons we're scared to be the aggressors some people who watch a lot of Daytime tv might have seen the Maury where he interviewed a 20 year old girl that was stabbed in the head like 20 times by her husband who she had been living in a safe house to get away from? She was walking to her car from a Wal-Mart when he jumped out and just started stabbing her. BIL's brother.

Comforting.

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